Still figuring it out...

I thought I had a pretty good idea of what my life would look like at 51, I imagined things would be different. I thought my life would be on cruise control, my kids would be grown, and DT and I would be planning our next adventure.

But life had other plans. I am planning my own adventures and it’s scary.

It's been two years since I lost DT. He was the constant in my story, the other half of every plan I ever made. And now, he's gone.

The first year was a blur of grief, travel (denial), and just trying to just get through the day. This second year has been a different kind of challenge—the quiet after the storm. I truly feel the space he left behind and the finality of it all.

Here I am, at 51, a widow, and trying to figure out who I am on my own. It's a strange feeling. I'm not who I was with him, and I'm not the person I was before him. So who am I now?

I'm taking it one day at a time. I'm learning to be okay with not having all the answers. I'm discovering interesting hobbies and trying new adventures. Some days are good, some are really hard, and some are just... okay.

If you're also in a season of figuring things out, just know you're not alone. The destination isn't what matters; it's the journey. And this journey, though unexpected, is mine to take. And for the first time in a long time, I feel both terrified, alone, and excited. 😬

I love you for riding this roller-coaster with me ❤️‍🩹

We will be alright 🤞🏾